An editor once was concerned that in one of my writings it seemed that I was focused on love in way that made it sound selfish because we benefit from it when we are loving people.
The Biblical “love your neighbor as yourself” tells us, however, that loving others is based on the foundation of loving ourselves. If we ourselves are not worthwhile, if we ourselves are not worthy of love, how can we love other people? If we are not worthy of love, our loving would not mean very much.
From a Buddhist perspective, the thing to grasp is that we are not separate from the rest of the universe. We are not an isolated bit buffered by the tides and storms on a great nihilistic ocean. We are connected with it all. The universe is within us just as much as we are within it. So, if that is true, how can we love others but feel guilty about loving ourselves?
To be blissful, become kind. Become compassionate. Don’t worry that this is selfishness because you benefit from it. That benefit only serves to open the heart more, to create more bliss, to create more love, which we can then share with others.